Short answer
The walimah is the wedding meal the husband gives to celebrate his marriage, and it is sunnah in the Hanafi school. It is best held after the couple have come together, on the day after or within a few days. It should be modest, and accepting a walimah invitation is a sunnah you should not miss without an excuse.
Walimah is sunnah (some Hanafis say sunnah mu'akkadah) and is the husband's responsibility. It is best after the wedding night. Accepting the invitation is sunnah, and stronger than other invitations, unless there is open sin at the event. Extravagance and showing off are disliked.
Other madhhabs
- Shafi'i
- Attending a walimah when invited is fard on the individual invited, if there is no excuse or wrongdoing there.
- Maliki
- Attending a walimah is wajib for the one specifically invited, if there is no excuse or wrongdoing there.
- Hanbali
- Attending the walimah on the first day is wajib for the one invited, if there is no excuse.
Explanation
When the Prophet ﷺ saw signs of a wedding on Abd al-Rahman ibn Awf, he told him to give a walimah even if only with one sheep. He gave walimahs for his own marriages, some with meat and bread and some with simpler food. So the walimah is part of the sunnah of marriage, a way of thanking Allah and announcing the nikah to the community.
Practical points:
- Who pays: the groom. The bride's family has no duty to host a meal, although a voluntary family dinner is permissible if no one is pressured.
- When: the preferred time is after the couple have spent their first night together. Holding it at the nikah or a little later is also fine.
- How big: as your means allow. Going into debt or showing off defeats the purpose.
- Whom to invite: the Prophet ﷺ called the worst food a walimah that keeps away those who would gladly come and invites those who would rather not. Include people who would love to come but cannot host you back.
- The setting: keep it free of what is haram, such as immodest mixing.
A walimah does not make a nikah valid or invalid. It is a celebration of a marriage that already exists. For the steps before it, see the nikah guide, and for the duas to make for the couple, see dua for marriage.
The evidence
Sahih Muslim 1427
Sahih... أولم ولو بشاة ...
"Give a walimah, even if only with one sheep."
The walimah is a sunnah of marriage.
Sahih al-Bukhari 5173
Sahih... إذا دعي أحدكم إلى الوليمة فليأتها ...
"When one of you is invited to a walimah, let him attend."
Accepting a walimah invitation is a strong sunnah.
Sahih Muslim 1432
Sahih... شر الطعام طعام الوليمة يمنعها من يأتيها ويدعى إليها من يأباها ...
"The worst food is the food of a walimah from which those who would come are kept away, while those who refuse it are invited."
A walimah should not shut out the poor who would gladly come.
Where the ruling is recorded
- al-Fatawa al-Hindiyya, Kitab al-Karahiyya, chapter on gifts and invitations. Walimah is sunnah and answering the invitation is sunnah.
- Radd al-Muhtar (Ibn Abidin), Kitab al-Hazr wa al-Ibahah, on invitations. When to attend, and when an invitation may be declined.
- al-Majmu' (Nawawi), Kitab al-Walimah. The Shafi'i view that attending is obligatory.
This answer is pending review by the scholars on our team. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.